Thursday, 2 June 2011

Celebrities, and Their Tits.

So, it's happened again. Some celebrity snapped a bunch of photos of her naughty bits on her phone, and they got leaked to the public. Which celebrity this time you ask? None other than Blake Lively, star of "Gossip Girl", "The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants" (parts one and two), and the upcoming "Green Lantern".

I'm sure you're asking yourself the same thing I am:

Why the *fuck* can't the famous figure out this simple fact. If they take pictures of their tits, they *will* be seen by the public. It's inevitiable.

Or to quote a disturbed literary figure: "It's axiomatic."

The popular theory is that she snapped these R-Rated pics while she was filming "The Town". Having seen them, I'd have to say I concur, since the tattoo's on her body match the ones that Make-up put on her for the movie. So, here it is. I'm gonna put it out there in plain-speak for all the celebrities who think that their boyfriends need a picture of them posing like self-absorbed cunts in their bathroom mirror:

HEY. CELEBRITIES. HERE'S THE DEAL. IF YOU TAKE A PICTURE OF YOUR TITS, ASS, AND NETHERLY GIRLY BITS.. PEOPLE WILL SEE. IT'S GOING TO HAPPEN. THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT. SO UNLESS YOU WANT YOUR VAG PLASTERED ACROSS THE WEB, KEEP YOUR FUCKING PANTS ON.

That being said: I hope no one takes my advice, because I like watching famous people fall.

(I almost included pictures, but I'm not sure who the rights belong to, so I neglected. If anyone is desperate to see them, go to Egotastic, or What Would Tyler Durden Do?)

I almost forgot to add: her Reps vehemently deny that this is her.. but she has nice tits, and I like nice tits -- after doing a forensic examination that approaches CSI levels, I can say -- this *is* her.

1 comment:

  1. you do have excellent taste in tits, my love.

    ReplyDelete